what we are reading – EightandHalf
One more director joins the club. Tarun Mansukhani will make his acting debut in Karan Johar’s new film My Name Is Khan. The news seems to be all hush-hush so far. Strangely, his name is missing from the credit list of the film on IMDB also though the list is quite long. For surprise ? Or just cheap thrill ? Or are we going blind ?
We discovered it when we recently saw the international trailer of the film. Do check it out.
Here it is. The multi-starrer of the year. Produced by UTV, Prakash Jha’s Raajneeti stars Ajay Devgan, Katrina Kaif, Ranbir Kapoor, Arjun Rampal, Vivek Oberoi, Nana Patekar and Manoj Bajpai. Check it out! WTF! why so much voiceover!!!!???? Guess few things will never change!
UPDATE – As soon as the promo was out today, Prakash Jha was furious. It seems he wasnt aware of it. The director doesnt know that his film’s first theatrical trailer is already out. Surprise! What’s more, it was out on UTV’s official channel on youtube. Talking about the head not knowing where the arm is! Few phone calls here and there and the promo was pulled out. But the good word had spread by then. And so here it is. We also had to replace the video. Jhaji, ek trailer ke liye, pehle VVC aur ab itni raajneeti ?
It was all hush-hush before she made headlines claiming that she managed to save 40 children in a day. A video featuring Lindsay Lohan’s journey in India has now been released on the net. Its part of the BBC documentary called Lindsay Lohan In India and deals with human trafficking.
And guess who is coming next! If gossipmongers are to be believed, a well known international actor is soon going to make his/her directorial debut and is all set to shoot the film in India. This one also deals with similar issue. Though we cant reveal the name right now but those of who are extra curious, here is what the Navis would have said – I see you, Luly!
We were feeling bit sad because it seems the copycats species was fast becoming extinct. Blame it on the new rules, hollywood studios coming to India, Rakesh Roshan-Ram Sampath case and many other reasons. Even Pritam has said no more copying. Anu Malik is long dead. But it seems all is still not well.
It was recently reported on www.itwofs.com and Mumbai Mirror that Lalit Pandit (of Jatin-Lalit duo) has lifted the tune of Pakistani singer Fakhr-e-Alam’s song Husnwaalon se poocho, that was part of his 2001 album Falam Connection. Husanwaalon becomes dilrubaoon ke jalwe in Dulha Mil Gaya. And here are the two songs…
This filmy friday there are two hindi releases. Pyaar Impossible and Dulha Mil Gaya. Pyaar Impossible is directed by Jugal Hansraj and stars Uday Chopra and Priyanka Chopra. Lets see if its any good.
Taran Adarsh (Indiafm) – On the whole, PYAAR IMPOSSIBLE is a feel-good film. If you are a romantic, this one’s for you. Even if you’re not, still watch it. Its one of those films that will bring a smile on your face – something that most Hindi films don’t do these days – 3/5
Rajeev Masand (CNN IBN) – Pyaar Impossible doesn’t work because it’s hard to empathize with any of the characters and because the actors fail to rise above the flawed script. It’s back-breakingly long at two hours and twenty-odd minutes, and I can’t remember one single scene that made me smile. The humour is ordinary, and the pre-climax romantic scene in a Mac store is the most embarrassing I can remember in recent times – 1/5
Mayank Shekhar (HT) – This is not Notting Hill, in only as much as Uday Chopra isn’t quite Hugh Grant. This is still an incessantly stunted ‘Hollywood rom-com’ knock-off, to the point that a neatly dictated formula will allow – 1.5/5
Nikhat Kazmi (TOI) – Nothing stupendous here. Just a sweet and soppy flavour with a picture-perfect Priyanka: Watchable – 3/5
Anupama Chopra (NDTV) – Uday plays the nerd with absolute sincerity but it’s hard to summon up any affection for him. And Dino seems to have decided that expression is a waste of time. His face just stays blank. Pyaar Impossible is depressingly dim-witted – 1.5/5
Sukanya Varma (Rediff) – It’s the kind of film, which could get over in five minutes if only Chopra 1 would let Chopra 2 finish his sentence. But no, Chopra 2 takes two and a half good hours to spill the beans leaving you with little besides a super hot Chopra 1 to admire – 2.5/5
Kaveree Bamzai (India Today) – She’s the beauty and he’s the geek. And she ends up falling in love with him. Yeah, right, if your father is one of Bollywood’s biggest producers, anything is possible – 2/5
Gaurav Malani (ET) – The moral of the film is that one shouldn’t judge a person by their looks. Going by that, however cool this candyfloss flick might appear, it’s still shallow on content. Pyaar Impossible might have certainly not aimed for a ‘10 on 10’. But is it really impossible to even strike an average? – 2/5
Meena Iyer (Mumbai Mirror) – Honestly guys wake up and smell the coffee. Forget love, even hate isn’t possible here. This film leaves you bereft of emotion – 2/5
Shweta Parande (Buzz18) – There is nothing new in Pyaar Impossible. Watch it only if you don’t mind a predictable story with a hot Priyanka Chopra, and some catchy music – 2.5/5
The other release is Dulha Mil Gaya directed by Mudassar Aziz and starring Shahrukh Khan (5 or 70 percent ?), Sushmita Sen and Fardeen Khan. And here is the score card.
Taran Adarsh (Indiafm) – The recipe is simple and uncomplicated…Take My fair Lady. Add Dulhan Wahi Jo Piya Man Bhaaye. Spray Naseeb Apna Apna. Sprinkle DDDLJ and Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi. Hey presto, Dulha Mil Gaya is ready to serve – 1.5/5
Rajeev Masand (CNN IBN) – Dulha Mil Gaya starring Fardeen Khan and Sushmita Sen, has been four years in the making, but has arrived almost fifteen years too late. A predictable old-fashioned entertainer that’s a throwback to those homogenous family films of the mid-90s, Dulha Mil Gaya borrows so much from the Yash Chopra/Karan Johar school of synthetic filmmaking that it’s hard to tell if there’s anything original to this story at all – 2/5
Anupama Chopra (NDTV) – Dulha Mil Gaya is a film caught in a time warp both literally and figuratively. The much-delayed movie is a bargain-basement version of Yash Chopra-Karan Johar movies from the late 1990s – 2/5
Nikhat Kazmi (TOI) – The problem with Dulha Mil Gaya lies in the fact that it has nothing new to offer. And that’s ironical at a time when almost every film that falls off Bollywood’s conveyor belt is brimming over with newness: new ideas, new plots, new musical notes, new actors, new narrative styles. Unforgivable – 2.5/5
Mayank Shekhar (HT) – I check my cellphone for the time yet again. The filmmakers could’ve checked for the year (they were making this film in as well) – 1/5
Kaveree Bamzai (India Today) – I suppose it’s funny to see Sushmita talking to her dog, Bozo, and kiss its miniature; or blow kisses to her invisible audience; or even behave like the eternal Miss Universe. But hey, that crown was in 1994. Grow up, please, Sushmita. Start acting. And do something less formulaic than “Indian girls rishte nibhana jaant hain” (Indian girls know how to keep up relationships). Grrr – 1/5
Preeti Arora (Rediff) – The West Indies and Trinidad are scenic and breathtaking. These locations haven’t been used too often in our films. But no film has ever managed to sustain itself on the basis of its locations. Watch the film if you can’t think of any other way to spend your weekend. Or else just avoid – 2.5/5
Gaurav Malani (ET) – Dulha Mil Gaya literally breaks new grounds with taking a Bollywood plot to Trinidad and Tobago. But beyond that this marriage miscarriage movie moves east of West Indies to introduce India for the zillionth time as nothing more than a small village in pastureland Punjab – 1.5/5
Meena Iyer (Mumbai Mirror) – They shot Dulha Mil Gaya all the way in Trinidad & Tobago. They could have shot it in Timbuktu and it wouldn’t stand an ice-cube’s chance in hell of surviving – 2/5
It seems impossible to expect even a half decent movie this week. Neither Pyaar nor Dulha. Head out for Sherlock Holmes in new avtaar or Paranormal Activity.
Yes, here he is! One of the musketeers. And his partner in crime is none other than lyricist Amitabh Bhattacharya. We googled a lot but could not get any pic of his. So, had to settle with only Amit Trivedi’s pic.
After the music and the film released, everyone wondered about Band Master Rangeela and Rasila’s identity, the duo who have been credited for the vocals of Emosanal Atyachaar in Dev D. But there was no straight answer. Click here to read an interesting report published in DNA on the same. It seems it was all fake or as they say, great cheap thrill! Aha, we are not the only ones who live by the mantra that life is all about cheap thrills!
Recently a friend was making his year end music list and was talking to the musicians involved to figure out more about their songs. When it came to Emosanal Attyachaar, he got to know everything except the identity of Master Rangeela & Rasila, the guys who delivered the anthem of the year. That got us more curious and see what what we finally discovered.
BTW, seems like even dozen good songs in an album are not good enough for the Screen Awards nominations. Check out their nomination list here. Can anyone enlighten us about the morons who made the list. They deserve special mention.
PS – Amit & Amitabh, sorry to burst the bubble. This one is cheaper thrill!
The first trailer of Farhan Akhtar-Deepika Padukone starrer Karthik Calling Karthik is out. Its directed by debutant Vijay Lalwani. BTW, do check out Deepika Padukone at 00:17, her ghaatan accent hasnt improved any bit since Love Aaj Kal.
What new can we say about him which has not been said before. And we fall short of words when it comes to describing the magic created by R D Burman. So on this anniversary, forget everything and listen to the Master’s voice. The madness that created magic. And say a big thanx to our music museum in Jaipur named Pavan Jha.
The music clip might take few seconds to load. so please bear.
And here is the magic from that madness…
Blame it on CB-VVC controversy. We have never been to Vinod Chopra’s website so many times. And here is what we discovered.
The first look of his next film 50th Anniversary. We know for sure that he is working on the script of the film and as the name suggests, the story revolves around an old couple who are soon going to celebrate their 50th marriage anniversary. So whats the plan ? The old man wants to spend the anniversary night in a five star hotel, his long cherished dream. And ? Well, all you curious folks have to wait for more. VVC plans to shoot his amibitious hollywood film Boken Horses (starring Mickey Rourkey) first and then will go for 50th Anniversary.
PS – Seems all our fears are coming true. With the money that 3 Idiots is making, VVC will not make one Eklavya, but five more.
Because he did a great and grand job there and you had all the voyeuristic pleasure. Because dil pe hath rakhkar you cant do that! That would be a great fake job.
What We Thought
1. Chetan Bhagat is a shitty writer who is like Priyadarshan of desi english writing. His PR guys are always working over time and going for the over kill. There is no reason to like him or his writing.
2. Raj Kumar Hirani was the Rocket Singh of Bollywood. He would not commit any wrong. Jadu ki jhappi and Gandhigiri happened because the man seriously believes in those virtues. The man who can say no to Shah Rukh Khan and his 20 crores, he surely has some ethics.
3. Vidhu Vinod Chopra is insane and passionate about films. The only producer who doesnt mind sharing profits with his cast and crew. But he loves talking only about himself and his films and has even passed his genes to his one time AD Sanjay Leela Bhansali. But he is here for cinema and nothing else.
Now, forget what Chetan said, what RajKumar Hirani replied, how VVC reacted and what percentage of the book is the film debate. Because their story has more twists and turns than the film. If you are still interested, you can click here to know more. Lets see what we got to know.
The Problem
The problem is simple. As Vir Sanghvi has put out in his blog post here. Imagine a producer like Vidhu Vinod Chopra and a filmmaker like RajKumar Hirani wanting to buy the rights of your book. Ask any sane writer, anyone will happily go for it and will settle for whatever decent money is offered.
When a writer is starting his career, most of them dont care much about the contract or the money. Because contracts are difficult to read and they are never in favour of writers anyway. And money doesnt matter much because its your first one. You just want to step in. For Chetan, am guessing it most have been the opposite. With IIT-IIM degree, how much more do you want ?
When signing a contract in bollywood, try asking for a fair deal and they will show you the door. And nobody wants to lose an opportunity in this cut-throat competition. Argue a bit and they will tell you that they have million other stories to tell, trillion other books in mind and drillion writers waiting to write for free. Go figure! And Chetan was ofcourse more than interested to make an entry into bollywood, as he sent the copy of the book to Hirani first, who found it interesting and thought about adapting it.
The way bollywood works, its mostly based on relationship. You take the spoken words for guarantee. The bigger the other party, the lesser power you have to talk. Writers are asked to start writing, money comes later on depending on the mood of the producer/director and then the contract is signed. And when any writer is desperately looking for work, he/she will go ahead and sign any contract. Dont look at this case, look at the contract.
Let me tell you the story of the lyricist who wrote one of the cult songs of this decade. It was in a cult film directed by a well respected director and produced by a well known production house. Since it was his first song, you would not believe what he was offered. Listen to this carefully, he was offered to take some costumes fom the film which was ordered for the lead character. He didn’t say anything, entry was important. No doubt he is doing good for himself now and can ask for a fat cheque.
Curious Case of Contracts
In bollywood, its just another way of full proof exploitation unless you belong to the league of Kashyap & Tyrewala . Its a document that state the writer agrees with all their terms and conditions. In an industry where there are millions waiting for a door to open, people go for whatever they get. In this scenario, it totally depends on the other party, the one who has all the powers, to decide the deal he/she is going for. And if a big producer like VVC goes for this kind of contract, you can imagine the rest.
Its true that Chetan signed the contract and accepted a rolling credit. But the contract itself is UNFAIR! He accepted it for whatever reasons. But to even offer a credit in the end is like trying to sabotage the credit. VVC could have atleast consulted his in-house film reviewer Anupama Chopra, who contributes for many international newspapers and magazines.
Everywhere in the world, everywhere, when a book is adapted on screen, its always credited in the opening credit roll. It doesnt matter if its a 5 percent, 50 or cent percent. Whats surprising is that Vidhu Vinod Chopra gets a credit for Associate Screenplay in the opening titles. Also, since there is lot of similarity between the book and the film as pointed by those who have read the book, Chetan deserves a story credit as well.
Rahman Cant, Chetan Can ?
Many believe that its Chetan’s mistake because he signed the contract. Well, he signed it but was there any other choice ? I doubt. Those of you who have any bit of info about how the industry works, will understand.
Do you know that all big and small musicians and singers who are currently working in the industry have to pay a fee to the music company every time they perform their own songs ? Because none of them own copyright over their own creations. How weird is that! It happens only in thie country and nowhere else. Blame it on contracts again. Because you have no choice but to sign it or you will be out of work soon. They will tel you forget intelluctual property, count what you are getting now! And we are talking about big names here. When A R Rahman asked for rights of music of Om Shanti Om, which he has suppose to compose, he was shown the door. He didnt even ask for complete rights but just wanted to share. The makers replaced Rahma with Vishal-Shekhar. Imagine if this can happen to A R Rahman, what can a new writer or even Chetan Bhagat do ? Even if he had asked for it, doubt it would have any kind of difference. You can read more about it here (Rahman episode) and here (artists & contracts).
In many countries including France, where the copyright issue was sorted out first, the contract is not counted for even if the artist has sold his intelluctual rights on the basis of contract. Because the creation of any artist always remains his/her, those are non-transferable rights, by any kind of contracts.
So, fuck the contracts. And its great that VVC and his gang put out the contract in the public domain. Now everyone can read and see for themselves, the way bollywood goes for bonded labour.
Forget Filmmaking, Learn Creditmaking
Learn it from Danny Boyle. He didnt bother even sharing the direction credits. It was not mentioned anywhere that Loveleen Tandon would get the co-director’s credit but Boyle felt that she deserves more. He even called his Chief AD Raj Acharya onstage at the Director’s Guild Award. It doesnt make him any less talented but just better human being.
Closer home, look at the credits of Kaminey. Cajetan Boy, whose short story was the trigger point for the film gets the first credit in the opening title and a font so big that can be spotted from a distance. Whats more, even a character in the film is names Cajetan.
What We Think Now
Chetan was never holier-than-thou, no doubt about that, and he still isn’t but all this is happening with those who taught us jadu ki jhappi and gandhigiri! Why fool us any more, Sir ? Wasnt there an easy solution ? When your cinema is all about commerce and credits, spare us the great gyaan of life. This real life story taught us more and hopefully our bollywoodwallahs are watching and learning too!
F.i.g.h.t C.l.u.b 