Archive for the ‘gossipmongers’ Category

sanjay gupta marraigeThere are days when we dont feel like getting out of bed. Because from bed we get down to the floor and ROFL!! It was one such morning. And the credit goes to Guptaji.

Sanjay Gupta is married now (Its not funny). Oops remarried(Thats also not funny). To his ex-wife Anu Lekhi (This is WTF moment!). Wondering why ? Because Guptaji has a roving eye, had quite a number of flings and suddenly he felt like becoming one-woman-man!

Times of India has more deatils about his remarriage…how,when,why and where. You can read the full article here.

To quote him from a recent interview….

As for the rest of the women, just as I’ve left my days of adapting foreign DVDs behind, I’ve also left the Reddys behind.

Guptaji, we are not sure about the Reddys but let Alibaug release and we will get the original dvd out of closet!

david….we think so! Because not many can claim to die at the pleasure point! We know one person who will surely endorse our view. Ram Gopal Verma. Now why we are talking death and sex on a cinema blog ?

If  you are still not aware, its because actor David Carradine is dead. David, the dude from Kill Bill. The cause of death – sex act gone horribly wrong. His dead body was found in the closet of a luxury hotel room in Bangkok, with a rope tied to his neck and genitals. Gossipmongers suggests  its called auto-erotic asphyxiation, a practice designed to boost sexual pleasure. You can read more about his death here

The actor was in Thailand to shoot a film called Stretch. Blame it  on our sick sense of humour, but why would you stretch yourself so much for sex ? On second thoughts, its fine to do so but not in auto-mode sex!And complete no-no if you happen to be Bangkok where its dirt cheap.

We are the last guys to talk moral issues but we could not stop ourself from wondering why would David do it if he was…

1. In Bangkok. Just shout out and you will get sex.

2. He was 72! Not the right age to expriment.

3. He was married five times! And still nobody with him.

Who would have thought BILL would KILL himself and in such a shocking way! RIP!

mumbai mirror guzarish cut

Today’s edition of Mumbai Mirror has a quote from our post “Check your CQ – Bhansali’s Guzaarish“. Actually the full article is on our post.

You can read the full post here. Its on Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s new film Guzaarish. The film stars Hrithik Roshan, Aishwarya Rai and newcomer Aditya Bal. And the Mumbai Mirror article is here (see pic).

Here is the most interesting part. To quote from the article…

However, a source close to Bhansali said, “Why are people in so much of a hurry? These things can really upset a director. Guzaarish has got nothing to do with any of these three films and Sanjay is very upset with the constant spotlight on the film. It is just a silly prank as no one has the soft copy of the script, so it’s not possible.”

Dear Mr Source (we have no clue how close you are to Bhansali)

We are ready to put a bet. Lets do it. What we said, if thats not the plot of Guzaarish then we will shut our blog. And if its the same what we said in our post…”Guzaarish = Charulata + The Painted Veil + The Sea Inside plus sprinkle some magic in it” then ? Or should we wait till its release ? whatver you want to do Mr/Ms Source!

fightclub

rajeev khandelwal It was a close call. Sanjay Leela Bhansali was desperate to finalise the lead actor for abhay deolhis next production Chenab Gandhi, to be directed by his assistant Vibhu Puri. First it was Hurman Baweja, then John Abraham and it seems finally Rajeev Khandelwal is in! Though Abhay Deol is still hopeful!

We are ROFL! Wonder why ? Look at the irony of the situation. Rajeev Khandelwal or Abhay Deol – both actors got their big success because of Anurag Kashyap Production (Aamir and Dev D).

And what do you do after you have acted in Anurag kashyap film ? Move to Bhansali school of filmmaking. Whats more interesting, Khandelwal made his mark in the debut film of Raj Kumar Gupta, who was Anurag Kashyap’s assistant. And now its Vibhu Puri, Bhansali’s assitant!

For those of you who dont know the love equation between Anurag Kashyap and Sanjay Leela Bhansali, click here to read the article which started it all. Kashyap’s take on Bhansali’s Black. We love it, but we would like to know what Bhansali thinks of Kashyap’s No Smoking!

And here is our big question – Bhansali, who doesnt watches anyone kind of cinema, to stop himself from getting influnced, finally saw Anurag Kashyap’s films ?

The movie is expected to go on floors in August. Chenab Gandhi is inspired by the story of Khan Abdul Gaffar Khan, India’s freedom fighter who was known as Frontier Gandhi. The movie also stars Amitabh Bachchan and Vidya Balan.   

charulataSea_insidethe painted veil

It seems to be a lucky day for cinema maniacs like us. We were surprised to find the script of Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s new film Guzaarish in our mailbox.  Yes, yes!! Thank you, whoever did the good deed of the day! (if you got anything to share, do remember to mail us at moifightclub@gmail.com).

We will reserve our comments on the script for the script review post later on. But as we read the script, we were trying to imagine the visuals, and all we could see was three films – Charulata, The Painted Veil and The Sea Inside.

We are starting a new feature – CYCQ – Check your CQ (Cinema Quotient)! If Guzaarish is Charulata meets The Painted Veil meets The Sea Inside, see if you can crack the story. Do sprinkle some ‘magic’ in the plot.

The film stars Hrithik Roshan, Aishwarya Rai and newcomer Aditya Bal. Mail us or comment here!

FilmfareTry these three steps if you are in desperate need for some cash.

First – Pick up any recent issue of Filmfare.

2nd – Lets put the bet. You say – Filmfare sucks!

3rd – Open the magazine. You will win!

Because week after week, they suck! And they are getting better at sucking upto the stars. The recent issue is a fashion special (ROFL, do they know the meaning of “special”? ) and they prove it again. It got nothing except the great cover pic ( Imran Khan & Sonam Kapoor). DONT buy and waste your money. Trust us! 

And here goes our dissection ( not specific to this issue) –

Editorial – Jitesh Pillai’s editorial should get the Razzies immediately, if there is any such award for editorial piece! He still sound like a star-stuck kid, and issue after issue he has the same thing to say….how much hard work they have put in the current copy! His editorial sounds more like a press release issued by some star’s publicist. Dude, go watch some “cinema”, look beyond the stars, stop sucking them for a while and if nothing works out, get a job as some star’s secretary. Your sucking up will help you for sure.  . 

Gossip – they serve old thakela goss. Read Mid-day and Mumbai Mirror instead and you get the best gossip every morning. Why wait for 2 weeks and pay more! Just for the gloss. Naah, doesnt make sense

Cover Story – Their covers are only A-list stars. There are hardly 20 A-list stars. And Filmfare has to do 24 covers in a year. They repeat, its d same shitty cycle – SRK, Aamir, Kareena, Saif, Bachchan and the same set of boring oooh-di-la-lah questions with equally boring answers! What are you eating, have you lost or gained weight, what are you shooting, nothing beyond that.

Interviews – They got the worst team of writers. Its a serious competition out there, who can write the worst piece. Since last few issues they are trying to have a more personal approach but nothing adds up to the drab copy. Do they even have copy editors ?

Sneak Peek – Here they still score some points, sometimes. May be, once in two months. Because they have one thing for sure. Access to the stars.

Features – Not a single damn bright idea! You wonder if the smooth glossy paper will make your arse feel better if you can use it for toilet paper!

Trend stories – They are the last one to spot the trends, after its been done to death in newspapers,magazine and tv channels.

Photo feature – Yes, they get the biggies here and some great pics too. But whoever writes the text with those pics, needs to be fired! Now!

Shatrughan Sinha’s Q n A – Is there anything new there ? Ramu’s blogs and his answers are more entertaining. And you dont have to pay for reading blogs.

Last piece – Jitesh, you dont have to do it again! Front and back. Just do it once dude. Or you like it both ways ? Its anyway fuckall, we can do without the bad aftertaste of the concluding piece.

And if you dont agree, just pick up the recent fashion special issue of Filmfare and tell us if you think there is any bright idea there. We will surrender. One page pic, one page of shitty writing, the magazine is full of it. There is nothing that you dont know or havent read. They havent tried anything new. New feature, new way of presenting, new text, nothing!

empireFor all you Filmfare fuckall fellas, here is something tht you must die. Go and check out the latest issue of Empire Magazine, the 20th anniversay special. Its a cover to die for! And you will get what we mean by the “big idea”! Magazine ho to waisa ho, warna na ho!

And oh yeh, we got money from Cineblitz and Stardust to write this nasty piece on Filmfare! Atleast they are honest, they dont suck upto anyone!

kites11First, the not so exclusive news : Kites is 3 hours long! Ok, 2 hours and 50 minutes to be precise! Like us, if the multiplex-distributors’ strike has also made you desperate to step into the theatre to watch any new release (exception – Kal Kisne Dekha doesnt count, even if we get free tickets…we have seen its “kal“) then get ready to be compensated soon, atleast with the duration. Because its three hours of Hrithik Roshan singing, dancing, jumping, kissing and everything possible. After all, its produced by Papa Rakesh Roshan. 

And now the exclusive one : Kites scored a Big “zero” at the Cannes Film Festival. But its a gutsy story! The name justifies it all. BIG pictures, big film, big stars, big film festival and a big zero. So Papa Roshan alongwith beta Hrithik Roshan, director Anurag Basu, Barbara Mori and Amit Khanna (Big Pictures) landed up at Cannes to promote the film. Now, why would you go to an international platform like Cannes and make a fool of yourself ? What will they say – From the makers of Krazzy4 ? And how they paid 2cr for plagiarising a song! Dont believe us, take a look at its promo.

Is there anything exciting about it ? (Barbara doesnt count if you think she is hot) Doesnt it look like Dhoom1 meets Dhoom2 ? Hollywood churns out movies with this kind of action almost every year, and nobody keeps the count. So who would get impressed with such a trailer ? They tried hard to sell the film. Met five big international distributors and everyone rejected the film. All five. No interest, no buyer. Cannes result = zero.

BTW, Rakesh Roshan was really hoping for a big international deal because lot of it is in spanish! Ahh…if only someone could tell him that they have seen this kind of stuff ages ago! Its may be first for him, or his beta!

For Kites trailer, pics, synopsis and stills, click here.

How is that  ? Cool or Daddy Cool ? Actually the news made us happy, damn happy. Well, check out this trailer of the film Daddy Cool. Its produced by Indra Kumar and his partner Ashok Thakeria.

Those have seen the film ‘Death at a funeral’, can easily guess that its a straight lift. And those of you havent seen the film, here is the synopsis of Daddy Cool.

daddy koolSo, what can happen at a funeral? Even, if it’s the funeral of Daddy Cool Douglas Lazarus? It’s in Goa, tears, sad speeches, melancholia… right? Wrong! When… The coffin makers deliver the wrong body.

Good Son Steven Lazarus (Suniel Shetty), an aspiring writer tries to give his father a decent funeral by delivering a eulogy…that includes a description of the rivers of Goa. Having flown in first class younger brother Brian (Ashish Chowdhry), suave, successful and much admired writer from Mumbai, not ready to share responsibility for his mother, saying “He barely has money to support himself and his dogs.” A rather “comfortable” estate agent Pinto (Vijay Patkar) tries to close a house deal for Nancy (Aarti Chabria) Steven’s wife who is trying to get away from her mother-in-law Mrs. Lazarus (Suhasini Mulay) , who though just bereaved, lives up to her title admirably.

A prospective groom Michael (Aftab Shivdasani) to a cousin, Maria (Tulip Joshi), nervous about meeting father-in-law to be (Naseer Abdullah ) comes in completely spaced out because of a hallucinogenic drug given to him out of Maria’s junkie brother Harry’s (Chunky Pandey) bottle of “Relaxo.” A knife-wielding suspicious Jenny (Kim Sharma) finds her husband Carlos (Javed Jaffrey) pleading forgiveness from the red- hot model Ayesha (Sophie Chodhry). While the model, told to bestow her favours on a man in a black suit, in order to feature in an ad film, finds herself in a room full of potential employers.

A repulsive spit on hands and flick back hair, Roadside Romeo kind of aspiring boyfriend, Jim (Vrajesh Hirjee) thinks that even a funeral is an opportunity to impress Maria. A doddering old Uncle Murphy (Prem Chopra) in a wheelchair believes in practicing “rapchick” to get the girls…And then enters a “Blackmailer” Andrew (Rajpal Yadav) who has a scandalous secret about the deceased Douglas “Daddy Cool” Lazarus (Sharat Saxena).

So what does happen is complete melange of madness, chaos, and a laugh a minute! So is it a ‘fun’eral? Or should we say the fun is real?

death at a funeralDeath At A funeral’s story is exactly the same. Whats more, it has midget and copying the same idea they have casted Rajpal Yadav for the same. Great guts, we must say.

According to Mid-day, Indra Kumar had to pay two crore to the producers of Death At A funeral, in an out-of-court settlement. About two months back, the makers sent a legal notice to the Indra and his business partner Ashok Thakeria stating that if the need arose they’d take this matter to court or he should simply offer to buy the rights of the film. The two parties had a meeting last week and Indra and Ashok handed two crore check to them.

We love it! Now they should understand why writers need to be paid more, much more than just peanuts!

Plagiarism dope : Here is the new trick of bollywood directors/producers. They would copy the film first and then write a letter to the producer of the original film stating that they have made a film and have just discovered that the “idea” of their film sounds similar to the original one. Since there is no copyright on “idea”, the original producer gives a green signal to our chor filmmakers. UTV and Ravi Chopra did the same for Aamir and Banda Yeh Bindaas hai. The original ones are Cavite and My Cousin Vinny.  

We wonder if Karan Johar has bought the rights or just taken “idea” permission for remaking Stepmom ? As always, we will kep you posted.

teen patti bigAmitabh Bachchan had posted two trailers of Teen Patti on his blog. But it seems his producers were unhappy with the way the promo was put online. They felt its too early to show the promo, and it seems some other website also  put the same promo on their site without any permission. So ? The more the merrier! Whats the harm if everyone puts the promo on their site ? Any producer would like to grab more eyeballs. If not for the right buzz, what are promos meant for ? Anyway, on the producer’s request, Bachchan has removed the film trailer from his blog.

Yippeee, we saw it. And if you didnt, wait! There is no other option. And if you are too desperate like us, you can click here to read the synopsis/story of the film. To check out the first look click here and for Bachchan-Ben Kingsley pics, click here

KrrishAfter Koi Mil Gaya, he wants them back! But not as the friendly Jadoo this time. He wants them to be big menace, powerful villains. The superhero played by Hrithik Roshan will get to beat them and save the world.

Also, the threat will be much bigger in the third part of the series. Tentatively titled Krrish2, the story will move beyond the family issue or anything to do with india. Post-Kites, Hrithik wants to go international, and on the lines of Hollywood superheroes, the aliens will be on the mission to destro the world. 

But there is a problem! According to gossipmongers, the writers developing the script of Krrish2 are not too excited with Hrithik’s idea of aliens. They feel alien villains will be too alien for desi junta. The script is still in development and has not been locked yet.

Papa Roshan also wants a fresh pair in the film. Ofcourse beta Roshan cant be replaced and so he is thinking about a new actress opposite him. Among the many other names, Deepika Padukone is a strong contender for the role. Once Kites is released, Rakesh Roshan will focus all his attention on Krrish2.