Archive for the ‘WTF’ Category

Time To Bajao – Bollywood’s 1st Ghanta Awards are here!

Posted: January 31, 2011 by moifightclub in bollywood, Contests, film, WTF
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If they have the Oscar, we have FilmFarce, Screen, IIFA, GIFA, Stardust, Apsara, Urvashi, Menaka and million others. And if they have the Razzies, here is our Ghanta Awards.

What is Ghanta ?

The Ghantas celebrates and rewards the worst of Bollywood for 2010. Over the last year Bollywood has nouned, verbalized and adjectived us to suffer like a bunch of ghantas with their ringing of theatrical genius. It has churned out truckloads of films that could have been more suitable as fertilizer for the parched fields of Vidharba.

Why the name Ghanta ?

A Ghanta is a word more flexible than Isha Sherwani dangling off the back off a D.T.C. bus filled with grabbing Emraan Hashmi clones. It is an abuse that can circumvent several rules of grammar…Example:

Noun: Hitler had just one ghanta.Verb: Watching We are Family was a ghanta of an experience. Adjective: Shahrukh probably ghantas humans of the male sex.

And here are the Nominations –

Worst Film -Blue. Raavan. Kurbaan. Pyaar Impossible. Housefull

Worst Breakthrough (for the worst new actors/actress) – Aditya Narayan(Shaapit). Luv Sinha(Saadiyaan). Neha Sharma (Crook). Shazahn Padamsee (Rocket Singh). Sukhwinder Singh (Kuchh Kariye)

Worst Story Rip-Off – Knock Out (Phonebooth). Bum Bum Bole (Children of Heaven). Prince (from every action movie ever made). Jaane Kahan Se Aayi Hai (My Stepmother is an Alien). Hum Tum aur Ghost (Ghost Town).

Worst Supporting Actor – Sir Ben Kingsley (Teen Patti). Farhan Akhtar (Evil Karthik). Sameer Dattani (I Hate Luv Storys). Zayed Khan (Blue, Anjaana Anjaani). Upen Patel (Ajab Prem ki Ghazab Kahani)

Worst Supporting Actress – Lara Dutta (Blue/Housefull/Do Knot Disturb). Nandana Sen (Prince). Kangana Ranaut (Kites). Shenaz Treasurywala (Radio). Tabu (Toh Baat Pakki)

Worst Director – Anthony D Souza (Blue). Mani Ratnam (Raavan). Jugal Hansraj (Pyaar Impossible). Sajid Khan (Housefull). Rensil d’ Silva (Kurbaan)

Worst Song – Papa Jag Jayega (Housefull). Mann Ka Radio (Radio). Pe Pe Pe (Chance pe Dance). All Izz Well (3 Idiots). Jailhouse Rock (We Are Family)

Worst Actor – Uday Chopra(Pyaar Impossible). Himesh (Radio). Abhishek Bachchan (Raavan). Shahid (Chance Pe Dance, Milenge Milenge, Badmaash Company, and Paathshaala). Akshay Kumar (Blue, Khatta Meetha, Housefull)

Worst Actress – Kareena Kapoor (Kurbaan, We Are Family). Aishwarya (Robot/Raavan). Barbara Mori (Kites). Sonam Kapoor (Aisha, I Hate Luv Storys). Anushka Sharma (Badmaash Company)

That’s Anything But Sexy – Udita Goswani in Chase. Kareena Kapoor seduction scene in Kurbaan. 2 hot women chasing Himesh in Radio. The Great Indian Butterfly (Aamir Bashir / Sandhya Mridul). Girl down on her knees from London Dreams (Salman Khan / Asin)

Worst Couple – Abhishek / Aishwarya Bachchan (Raavan). Uday Chopra / Priyanka Chopra (Pyaar Impossible).Naseeruddin Shah / Vidya Balan (Ishqiya). Shahid Kapoor / Kareena Kapoor (Milenge Milenge). Sushmita Sen / Govinda (Do Knot Disturb)

WTF Was That -The baby sucking vacuum from 3 Idiots. The diamond sucking vacuum from Prince. Viveik Oberoi’s Bruno-inspired leather outfit from Prince. Celina Jaitley’s cleavage in Hello Darling! The vegetarian sharks that only circled, but never attacked, the bleeding Akshay Kumar, Zayed Khan & Sanjay Dutt underwater in Blue.

Ghanta Winners – Winners will be announced at the 1st Ghanta Awards night at Santorini Lounge (Tian) and broadcast live to via webcast on February 6th, 2011.

Timeline – Only films released between Diwali 2009 and Diwali 2010 were up for consideration.

To know more about the Ghanta Awards, click here.

PS – All info is from official press release.

WTF : Imran Khan’s Delhi Belly is shelved ? AKP denies it.

Posted: December 7, 2010 by moifightclub in bollywood, film, WTF, Xclusive
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UPDATE : After the news of Delhi Belly getting shelved came out, AKP has now denied the news. According to official release – On behalf of Aamir Khan  Productions, we would like to inform that Delhi Belly has not been shelved. The film is presently in it’s post production stages. Delhi Belly will release in summer 2011.

The Delhi Belly news was passed to us from a reliable friend who has worked on the film. So, we still believe in what he told us. Also, strangely the IMDB page of the film has been removed. Search for Delhi Belly and you get nothing. But you can click here to check out the google cache of the same page which was there earlier.

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December is going to be the month of “shelved” news. First we told you the news about Vidhu Vinod Chopra’s Broken Horses and now its about Imran Khan’s new film.

Its shocking but it seems to be true. The film was shot long back. And till now there has been no announcements about the release plan. Starring Imran Khan, Shenaz Treasurywala, Kunaal Roy Kapoor and Vir Das in the lead, the film has been directed by Abhinay Deo.

UTV and Aamir Khan produced the film. But at the editing stage they realised that its not making much sense. They shot, re-shot, edited, re-edited, tried everything possible and spent about Rs 20 crores on it but still could not make much sense of it. And now they have finally decided to shelve it.

UTV doesn’t want to go ahead with it any more and Aamir Khan is not that stupid to take all the risk himself. The director Abhinay Deo has moved on to his next film and Imran Khan is clueless about the release date. The film is a sex comedy set in Delhi and is mostly in English. And some are putting the blame on Bhansali’s Guzaarish. With such a big dud in its kitty, UTV doesn’t want to take any more risk. In the next few days, if you hear about more films getting shelved, don’t be surprised.

PS – Dear UTV, stop lying now. Or tell us who is reading the scripts and green-lighting the films ? If they can’t read scripts and make sense of it, try us. Chance Pe Dance ?

WTF : Who let the Rats out ?

Posted: November 25, 2010 by moifightclub in video, WTF
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Aha, it seems like a day of anonymous mails. And am sure that you guys know how much we  love every bit of that “A” part. First, came the synopsis of Dibakar Banerjee’s Shanghai, which we removed it later because at this point it might prove bad for the film. ( Btw, Dear Dibakar, do send us the official synopsis whenever its ready. We are waiting and how!) And now this video file. Can’t make sense of it but we have been promised that it will make some sense in the next few days. So, we are playing along!

Do click the play button and let us know if it makes any sense.

WTF : The budget of Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s Guzaarish is 80cr!

Posted: September 30, 2010 by moifightclub in bollywood, film, News, WTF, Xclusive
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Yes, 80 fucking crores! What are the guys at UTV Motion Pictures smoking ? Please pass the dope. And believe it or not, the budget is not the only shocking part of the film.

Try guessing director Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s fees. As wild as you want. And if you are done with it, breathe easy and hold your jaws tightly. Bhansali has been paid Rs 25 fucking crore as writing & direction fees! Beat that. And 25 crore to the director whose last film was Saawariya! BTW, do the guys at UTV read scripts ? Doesn’t look like. Atleast thats what it seems from their last few releases. And those of you, who are still bothered about Saawariya – how it got made and financed, click here to read the curious case of Saawariya. Its a must read. Seems like UTV guys don’t subscribe to Open Magazine. Do it, its good. And Beware!

Also, Hrithik Roshan has been paid Rs 15crore and Aishwarya Rai’s fees is Rs 5 crore for Guzaarish, and both of them command much higher fee in the market. Bhansali’s 25crore fees also include the clause that he will get Hrithik & Aishwarya Rai  at a discounted rate. The production budget of the film is Rs 35 crore. And that’s how the total budget is Rs 80 crore ( 25 + 15 + 5 + 35)

Now, the big question is how do they plan to recover so much ? It seems UTV is clear on that front. If they are lucky, they will break even. If not, its just to make their CV look good, maintain their position in the share market, make it look big to get easy funding. Its all about the big picture with the biggest stars and a big director and Guzaarish is just a 80crore tool to make that picture look good. The film ?  Well, it seems like Prestige meets The Sea Inside meets The Diving Bell and the butterfly.

WTF : Shabana Azmi’s 60th birthday – Slum Cake!

Posted: September 23, 2010 by moifightclub in Bolly Jokes, gossipmongers, News, pics, shit, WTF
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Yes, thats the cake. And no, its not a typo for PLUM cake. Its a SLUM cake! Aur bolo ? Not only the idea is disgusting but even it looks fugly! Imagine, you are eating a slum at a birthday party. How moronic! Well, its Bollylalaland. It was Javed Akhtar’s idea, cut by Shabana Azmi and bollywood biggies danced their way to glory.

Click here to read to Guardian piece on slum cake. Click here for the party pics and here for the party report. And if you wondering about Vidya Balan’s weird wardrobe, well, headgear was the theme of the party.

Satyajit Ray, Nayak, SRK, Blasphemy, Bengali, Autograph – Can you connect the dots ?

Posted: August 20, 2010 by moifightclub in Bolly Jokes, bollywood, cinema, first look, pics, songs & videos, Tollywood, Trailer, video, WTF
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If not, read on. Its one of our favourite Ray films starring Uttam Kumar. If you haven’t seen it yet, do watch. BTW, what are you doing till now if you haven’t seen Nayak!

So, its easy to connect Satyajit Ray and Nayak. But Shah Rukh Khan ? Well, courtesy some Pillai who thinks “its screaming to be remade into a film with Shah Rukh Khan”. There comes BLASPHEMY! BLASPHEMY! Aren’t there better ways to suck up to the stars ? Here’s what he tweeted after watching the film..

But what else can you expect from the editor of the most expensive and glossy toilet paper roll! Well, there are better ways to connect the two. Click here to read a post by Gobbledyspook who connects the Nayak with the superstar!

And now back to bengali cinema. There is more to the Nayak story! Click on the play button to catch the promo of a new Bengali film called Autograph directed by Srijit Mukherjee. It completes the circle and looks interesting. The film stars Prosenjit Chatterjee, Nandana Sen and Indraneil Sengupta.

And here is the official synopsis of the film…

Calcutta , 1966.

An iconic Director collaborated with the greatest Superstar of Bengal … And a Classic was born.

43 years later, the film changed three lives forever.

Arun Chatterjee, the reigning matinee idol of the Bengali Film Industry.

Shubhobroto Mitra, an aspiring director who wants to remake Satyajit Ray’s Nayak with Arun as the lead.

Srinandita Sen, an idealistic theatre actress and Shubho’s live-in partner who gets cast as the journalist in the film.

“ Autograph ” charts the journeys of these three lives, as they bond and  separate through time and space, in two intertwining narratives.

That is…till their final tryst with destiny.

Autograph is about stories. Reel and real.

Autograph is about dreams. Converging and diverging.

Autograph is about ambition. That creates and destroys.

WTHolyF – Gandu Trailer & Bet you havent seen a desi trailer like this one!

Posted: August 11, 2010 by moifightclub in Bet You Didn't Know, cast & crew, cinema, first look, Regional, songs & videos, Tollywood, Trailer, WTF
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If the header seems to over-hype the trailer, quickly click on the play button!

UPDATE – The video has been removed by Youtube. And if you haven’t seen it yet, click here or here to watch it.

Its a bengali film directed by Q. Ok, thats Quashik Mukherjee. Call it porn or  whatever you want to but it looks killer! Porn, sex, masturbation, mommy, expletives, bengali rap and all in black & white – deadly combo! Gimme more ! Tell me more! Who got more dope ?

Thanks to Aseem Chhabra for the tip.

WTF : Even the poster of Anjaana Anjaani is NOT original!

Posted: August 6, 2010 by moifightclub in bollywood, film, first look, News, pics, plagiarism, WTF
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We are not sure who designed the poster of Anjaana Anjaani but we are sure about one thing – its a straight lift from An Education. Just check out both the posters. Need we say more! Tip by @damoviemaniac. The film is directed by Siddharth Anand and stars Ranbir Kapoor & Priyanka Chopra.

And to check out its theatrical trailer and to know its original source from where it has taken the inspiration, click here. We have put a bet! The goss from crew of Anjanaa Anjaani is that they have take the basic story idea from The Girl On The Bridge and have Bollywoodised it by adding naach-gaana & Las Vegas!

And here is the poster of An Education….

Aakrosh is Mississippi Burning & Hello Darling is Nine To Five ?

Posted: August 3, 2010 by moifightclub in bollywood, film, Hollywood, News, plagiarism, songs & videos, Trailer, WTF
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And fuck we care! Because one is Priyadarshan and the other is Subhash Ghai production. Damoviemaniac informed us about the first one. We checked with one of the crew members and bingo! It seems to be true. Only the “issue” has been changed. The second one doesn’t need any confirmation. Just check out the trailers.

And here is the next one…

Dopey & Dimpy – The story of Rahul Mahajan & Dimpy Ganguly in pics

Posted: August 1, 2010 by moifightclub in Breaking News, News, pics, television, WTF
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We have no sympathy for anyone – Rahul Mahajan or Dimpy Ganguly. They deserve each other. Or how else do you explain the fact that someone participated in a swayamvar to marry Rahul Mahajan. Its Ripley’s Believe It Or Not! Weird are the ways of the world!

Since the whole world is googling them and are creating Eiffel Towers on our blog stats page, we felt bit guilty that we haven’t put a post on their latest controversy. So, here it is…The Story of Dopey & Dimpy in pictures…put the cursor on the pic for our captions!

And as the joke goes…wondering what Rahul Mahajan is singing now….

Give me some sunshine…..give me some rain,

Give me another wife that I can beat up once again….

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