Posts Tagged ‘Madhur Bhandarkar’

How many times can you make the same film?

Or at least with the same template?

Only Madhur Bhandarkar can answer that question.

But one thing is for sure – Deja vu should really be Madhur Bhandarkar’s middle name.

And looks like his latest film “Heroine” is not going to be any different.

It started with a tweet by Mihir Fadnavis.

And then came the trailer of the film.

So does it follow the Bhandarkarism theory of filmmaking? You don’t need a high IQ to figure that out. But will there be any surprises? Are we missing anything? Or as DrDang pointed out in his tweet..

So no gays in the trailer so far. what else is missing?

Here’s the contest. You have to guess the story of Heroine. At least the main plot points. What happens next? The one who can guess the maximum number of plot points, will be the winner. We are not sure about the prize now but hopefully it will be something good for sure. If nothing, let’s play for cheap thrills! Because not everyday you get to apply the Theory Of Bhandarkarism. Just remember – every frame (of trailer) counts!

Post your answers in the comments section. We will declare the winner the day the film releases.

Fuck the Filmfare, Screen, IIFA, GIFA, Stardust, Zee Cine and every XYZ Awards. They are all the same. Tv shows that needs naach-gaana and stars. And so the competition is who sucks better than whom and which star!  Most of them are organised by even management companies who get the stars to do naach-gaana and make sure that everyone gets a fat cheque.

So, here is the real deal – Golden Kela Awards by Random Magazine . Desi Razzies! Pure honesty! 100 percent shuddh!Its the second year of the award. And for a change, we agree with every choice of theirs. Thats rare! Outlook’s Follywood Awards are also good but Golden Kela Awards scores better because they have much better categories.

Worst Film – Kambakkht Ishq

Worst Director – Ashutosh Gowariker for WTF is Your Raashee 

Worst Actor – Harman/Hurman/Harrman/Harmun/Whatever Baweja for WTFYR

Worst Actress – Kareena Kapoor for Kambakkht Ishq

Worst Supporting Actor – Ranvir Shorey for Chandi Chowk to China

Worst Supporting Actress – Deepika Padukone for Chandni Chowk To China

Worst Debutant Male – Jackie Bhagnani for Kal Kisne Dekha

Worst Debutant Female – Shruti Hasan for Luck

Worst Pair – Rani Mukherjee & Shahid Kapoor for Dil Bole Hadippa

When Did This Come Out Award – Deepak Tijori’s Fox

Most Original Story Award – Dil Bole Hadippa copied from She’s The Man

Baawra Ho Gaya Hai Ke Award – Sylvester Stallone & Denise Richards for Kambakkht Ishq

Most Irritating Song of the year Award – Pritam for Love Mera Hit Hit from Billu Barber

Most Atrocious Lyrics Award- Sameer for Love Me Love Me from Wanted

Special Awards 

The Lajja Award for Worst Treatment of a Serious Issue – Kabir Khan & Aditya Chopra for New York

The Dara Singh Award For Worst Accent – Abhishek Bachchan for Delhi 6

The Black Award for Emotional Blackmail – Paa

The Insensitivity Award – Chandni Chowk To China

The Bas Kijiye Bahut Ho Gaya Award  – Madhur Bhandarkar

The Critic’s Award of 2009 – Taran Adarsh

Cyrus Broacha, the chief guest of the show was awarded the Cyrus Broacha Memorial Award this year. To read more about the awards, nominations and blogs, click here. And click on the play button to watch a tv report on Kela-ophobia.

2009 – The Master of Feel Bad started the year delivering his career’s first hit and the Master of Feel Good Cinema ended the year with a recording breaking monster hit! Aha, not that bad if we count only the boundaries. After the musical notes of the year, we sat down to discuss the filmy notes of the year. Here it is – the good, the bad and the fuglies!

1. Best Credit Roll – If ever a credit roll said something so simply and superbly, this is it. Luck By Chance. Also great debut by Zoya Akhtar.

2. Anurag Kashyap turned musical and how! More than a dozen songs and we discovered Amit Trivedi.

3. Anurag Kashyap – 2009 belongs to only one director. Dev D, Gulaal and even Paanch finally got a release, you know where. Whats more, he finished shooting his next film That Girl In Yellow Boots in just 13 days. Aur bolo ?

PS : The same Anurag Kashyap wrote the dialogues for Kurbaan ! Strange bedfellows remained strange.

4. Nobody, we repeat nobody, can save Harman/Hurrman/Harmann/Harrman/Whatever it is Baweja.

5. Wooden Film of the Year – New York. Three good looking woods with zero expression.

6. Ranbir Kapoor – Dude of the year! He is not only working with best directors of bollywood but delivering his best too. Cool & confused, fool & romantic, middle class & lost – he did it all.

7.Imran Luck Khan – The poster boy of 2008 is light years behind Ranbir. He only talks cool and acts still uncool.  Competition, whats that ?

8. Imtiaz Ali has only one story to tell. The journey of cool and confused lovers on the verge of marriage. First time, they were about to mary. Second time, they were close to marriage. This time, they finally married and then solved their problem. More here and here.

9. Samir Karnik got money to make one more movie. Who ? Where ? Why ? How ?

10. Rani Mukherjee’s career is over. Hadippa!

11. Multiplex cinema & hits are not everything. Its a big myth. Ask the makers of Wanted. Or is it only Salman Khan ?

12. And if its Salman Khan, why Main Aur Mrs Khanna packed up in just two days ? As they say, nobody knows anything. And what was UTV smoking ? 

13. Overrated Gimmicky shit of the year – Paa. More ramblings here.

14. R Balki should stick to making tv commercials. One idea and thats it. He also told the same story again. Smart & dying child bring lovers back together. Age gap somewhere. Check.

15. Akshay Kumar’s bubble busted and how!. He failed everywhere. Chandni Chowk, China, Hollywood, under water, inside or outside Tasveer.

16. The Invisible Director – Who is Anurag Singh ? Does anyone knows him ? The man who put the last nail in the coffin of Rani’s acting career. Hadippa!

17. Sanjay Gupta and gang (read Suparn) are still copying. Even the promos! Now the Unknown ones! More here.

18. Suresh Nair – the only writer to have two big films releases on the same friday. Aladin & London Dreams and both flopped.

19. Underrated Film – Sooni Tarporevala’s delightful Little Zizou, where all the possible parsis united to turn bollywood into pollywood! ( Missed Barah Aana, Mohandas)

20. Ripley’s Believe It Or Not – Sunil Shetty got an award for acting in Anant Mahadevan’s Red Alert – the War Within. Believe it, nobody has seen the film yet.

21. Most Subtle Expression of the year – In Rakeysh Omprakash Mehra’s Delhi 6, a man lands up with a mirror to show your andar ka kala bandar! Beat this!

22. Nagesh Kuknoor – Dont give him big budgests and big stars. He will go cuckoo-noor!

23. Vishal Bhardwaj delivered again. Five films in a row. And showed us Amole Gupte – the actor. More here.

24. Ajab Prem ki Gazab Kahani tried too hard to be Andaz Apna Apna. Insanity happens! You cant plan and design it.

25. ENG Filmmaker -Madhur Bhandarkar continued his expose and it finally flopped.

26. Smirk & Smug of the Year – Vivek Oberoi in Kurbaan. It was the ROFLOL film of the year where terrorism was wrapped in chiffon saree.

27. RajKumar Hirani lied to all of us and made the same film again. As a friend said, its Munnabhai B Tech. More here.

28. Couple Of The Year – Jaideep Sahni & Shimit Amin who delivered Rocket Singh – Sales Man of the Year! More here.

29. The only U-25 who proved us wrong – Ayan Mukherjee. Wake up Sid. Confident debut. More here.

30. Only 12 scenes, not 12 roles – Ask Priyanka Chopra. Easily the best performance of the year. Length doesnt matter, performanace counts. Vishal did it. Gowariker failed.

Bravery Awards  – Aftab Shivdasani turned writer and producer with Aao Wish Karein.

Someone directed a film titled Jai-Veeru!

Abhijeet Sawant turned actor.

LOL Titles Of The Year  – They said it all. No explanations required.

Kal Kisne Dekha

Do Knot Disturb

Fruit & Nuts

London Nightmares

Blue-s

Aa Dekhein Zara

Dhoondte Rah Jaoge

Ek Se Bure Do

(Tough) Luck

Shorkut – The Con Is On

PS. ENG – Electronic New Gathering.

Coming up next –  what to expect in 2010!

Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab KahaniIts that day of the week which we love the most! Filmy Friday! This week there are two new hindi releases – Ajab Prem Ki Ghajab Kahani (APKGK) and Jail. Or as they are saying, its Ranbir Kapoor VS Neil Nitin Mukesh, now that Imran Khan is miles and miles behind!

APKGK is directed by Raj Kumar Santoshi and stars Ranbir Kapoor and Katrina Kaif. And here are the early reviews…

Taran Adarsh(Indiafm) – On the whole, APKGK entertains majorly. At the box-office, the fantastic pre-release campaign coupled with the terrific chemistry between Ranbir and Katrina, excellent music by Pritam and tremendous appeal for youth should ensure a big start for the film at the ticket window – 4/5

Anupama Chopra (NDTV) – Ajab Prem Ki Gazab Kahani, a comedy set in a comic book universe, is a frustratingly uneven film. Some of it is genuinely funny and delightful and some of it is repetitive, and annoyingly tedious – 3/5

Raja Sen (Rediff) -Honestly, it’s just good to watch a film with memorable comedy again. Heaven knows its been a while. And one that takes us back to a different, more wholesome kind of cinema. Even as the climax drags into predictability, Santoshi ensures that even divine intervention — to pull it all back on track again — comes with laughs. Gotta love that – 3.5/5

Mayank Shekhar (HT) – You look through this hollowness, and sense there is not a comic bone at all. There is certainly no romance either. Good boy (Ranbir Kapoor) fumbles and chases good girl (Kaif) through multiply tiring sequences. Saawariya for a debut was a poor practical joke on young Kapoor. This humourlessness, if at all, is infinitely sappier.

Gaurav Malani(Indiatimes) – The one thing you can’t overlook noticing in Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab Kahani is how Rajkumar Santoshi takes liberal references from every popular prem kahani of Bollywood and ends up with an ajeeb (weird) jumbled screenplay – 2/5

Nikhat Kazmi(TOI) – Gazab comedy, this one. Really, Ranbir is a revelation, Katrina is full of beans and the newly formented Ranbir-Katrina chemistry sets the screen on fire in this mad hatter’s tea party that takes you on a roller-coaster ride as Raj Kumar Santoshi tries to retrack his way to his Andaz Apna Apna days – 4/5

Rajeev Masand (CNN IBN) – Despite its hiccups, Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab Kahani is not an entirely unwatchable film, and the credit for that goes squarely to its leads who invest sincerity and genuine enthusiasm while attacking their roles. Katrina Kaif breezes through her scenes, endearing you to the vulnerable Jenny; striking up a radiant chemistry with her co-star. As for Ranbir Kapoor, he is the brightest spot in this ordinary film, rising above the script’s many holes, occasionally even making the stupidity work – 2.5/5

Khalid Mohamed (PFC) – The kid’s brilliant. So watch it Hrithik Roshan, Shahid Kapoor and all the big and small Khans. At the rate he’s going – by sheer evidence of his screen charisma, technical felicity and youth power – Ranbir Kapoor is more than likely to be the Next Best Thing, if he isn’t one already. He’s RK Jr and he’s more than super A-Ok -2.5/5

Shubhra Gupta(Indian Express) – Once upon a time, Rajkumar Santoshi made a lovely little film which was all fun and games. ‘Andaz Apna Apna’ (1994), which came at a time when neither Aamir nor Salman were Superstars Inc., has traveled well—its unfettered joyousness delights at every fresh viewing. The same cannot be said for Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab Kahani – 1/5

Kaveree Bamzai (India Today) – The movie sails because of Kapoor’s effortless ease. He dances like a dream, looks good enough to take your eyes off Kaif, and raises a lot of laughs with his goofiness. And guess what, he looks pretty in pink too. Ad he has a memorable no sorry, no thank you dialogie as well: all he wants is to be Kaif’s friend, no complaints, no demands. This one, ladies and gentlemen, is a stayer. See you around, Ranbir – 3/5

Minty Tejpal (Mumbai Mirror) – For the most part of the film, you do drool, mostly over the totally delicious lead pair, and often enough over the ridiculous dialogue in this absurd, mad comedy being played out on screen. Ha ha and a hoot. In fact, the first half of the film just rocks all the way – 3.5/5

Anand Vaishanav (Buzz18) – With such a gorgeous pair, Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab Kahani, could have been a charming joyride. But instead it settles for a routine, time pass watch. Ranbir Kapoor and Katrina Kaif’s chemistry shines long after the curtains fall down – 2.5/5

Jail is directed by Madhur Bhandarkar and stars Neil Nitin Mukesh,  Mugdha Godse and Manoj Bajpai.

Rajeev Masand (CNN IBN) – Because it’s well-intentioned and settles for a hopeful message, you stay with the film despite the fact that it’s never quite compelling. It’s got its heart in the right place, but sometimes that’s not enough – 2.5 /5

Anupama Chopra (NDTV) – Bhandarkar’s cinema has often been called hard-hitting but the trouble with Jail is that it simply doesn’t hit hard enough. See it if you must – 2.5/5

Taran Adarsh(Indiafm) – On the whole, JAIL is a well-made film from an expert storyteller. At the box-office, the film will appeal to those with an appetite for hard-hitting, realistic fares, but its clash with APKGK will affect its business to an extent – 3/5 

Khalid Mohamed (PFC) – Okay, okay, for heaven’s sake this is a Bhandarkar, Madhur Bhandarkar movie. Get real, appreciate Jail for being as rough, real and dammit, outspoken. Sorry guys, want to..however it’s anything but. It’s just not in the league of the eye-opening Fashion, Traffic Signal, Page 3 and Chandni Bar, which have their loyal admirers including the National Film Award juries. Yeah – 2/5 (there’s nothing here that you don’t know or haven’t seen already)

Raja Sen(Rediff) – The detailing is shoddy, the characters cardboard and the dialogue plain laughable. Jail is a formulaic, below average Bollywood headache, slowed down to lugubrious dullness. Groan. Leave it be, this prison of cardboard and cliche. We all deserve better – 1/5

Mayank Shekhar (HT) – What we may have liked to know, like with any story, is something more about the hero himself — his past, his conflicts, his shattered dreams. It could’ve greatly helped with the sorely missed empathy. But that’s not to be. I guess, only in a film-culture as less evolved as ours, would a movie with merely a setting, pride itself so much on realism alone – 2/5

Kaveree Bamzai (India Today) – There’s a sense that we’re sitting in on a reality show, that it’s Bigg Boss Season 4 set inside a jail. You find yourself wishing Mukesh’s ordeal ends, not so much for him as for you. Hey Mr Bhandarkar, it’s time to think of a new formula, or choose a subject that thrills like Fashion- 2/5

Gaurav Malani(Indiatimes) – Compare Jail to Madhur Bhandarkar’s earlier works and you would be disappointed to a degree. Nevertheless, compare it to many other mediocre movies of today and Jail is still a step ahead. Jail is captivating but not consistently – 2.5/5

Minty Tejpal (Mumbai Mirror) – The movie itself is more like a well-researched documentary that teaches you a few new things about life in jail, so it’s pretty instructive for anyone planning on landing up there. The promos of Jail read, ‘sentenced on November 6’. Yes, ‘sentenced’ is right – 2/5

Shweta Parande(Buzz18) – If the film works, it will only be because of Madhur’s execution. Otherwise, Jail has nothing new to offer – 2/5

imran khanImran Khan is the latest bollywood celeb to join Twitter. Karan Johar introduced him to it. Imran can be found at http://twitter.com/1mrankhan .

We have also updated the list of other bollywood celebs on twitter. Take your pick.

Actors

Priyanka Chopra – http://twitter.com/priyankachopra

Uday Chopra – http://twitter.com/udaychopra

Sonam Kapoor – http://twitter.com/sonamakapoor

Ritesh Deshmukh – http://twitter.com/Riteishd

Mallika Sherawat – http://twitter.com/MallikaLA

Gul Panag –  http://twitter.com/gulpanag

Dino Morea – http://twitter.com/DinoMorea9

Ayesha Takia – http://twitter.com/Ayeshatakia

Lara Dutta – http://twitter.com/DuttaLara

Anushka Sharma – http://twitter.com/ANUSHKASHARMA01

Rahul Khanna – http://twitter.com/R_Khanna

 

Directors

Ram Gopal Varma – http://twitter.com/rgvzoomin

Shekhar Kapur – http://twitter.com/shekharkapur

Saket Chaudhary – http://twitter.com/sakiboy

Karan Johar – http://twitter.com/kjohar25

Hansal Mehta – http://twitter.com/hansal

Sujoy Ghosh – http://twitter.com/sujoy_g

Tarun Mansukhani – http://twitter.com/Tarunmansukhani

Madhur Bhandarkar – http://twitter.com/mbhandarkar

Kaizad Gustad – http://twitter.com/kaizadgustad

 

Music

Vishal Dadlani – http://twitter.com/V1SH4L

 Shreya Ghoshal – http://twitter.com/shreyaghoshal

 

Others (Producer s/ Writers/ Magazine)

Pritish Nandy – http://twitter.com/PritishNandy

Shridhar Raghavan – http://twitter.com/ShridharR

Amit Khanna – http://twitter.com/amitkhanna 

Bobby Bedi – http://twitter.com/bobbybedi

Filmfare – http://twitter.com/filmfare

We are sure, have missed many others. Do let us know.

Here are some pics from the IFFA Awards Macau – 2009. Pics of Amitabh Bachchan, Abhishek Bachchan, Aishwarya Rai, Anil Kapoor, Neil Nitin Mukesh, Mugdha Godse, Govinda, Sushmita Sen, Arshad Warsi, Amrita Rao, Sonam Kapoor, Raveena Tandon, Madhur Bhandarkar, Akshaye Khanna, Hrithik Roshan, Lara Dutta and Bipasha Bashu.

These are pics from various events at IIFA Awards Macau 2009 – the fashion show, green carpet, film workshop, unveiling of Bachchan’s wax statue ( again ??) , press conference of David Dhawan’s Do Knot Disturb and Madhur Bhandarkar’s Jail. Enjoy!

neilFor those of you who are interested to know more about Madhur Bhandarkar’s Jail, we have got the synopsis of the film. The film stars Neil Nitin Mukesh. Though we dont care much, neither for the director nor for the actor. We are sure about one thing. Its gonna be one more Bhandarkarism expose!

Here goes Jail’s plot/story/synopsis :

The Protagonist Parag Dixit was the King of his own World…

A great job, a lovely house, a lovelier girlfriend Maansi. A night out with friends at some suburban watering hole after a hard day’s job, life just couldn’t get better for him.

Speed… that’s what Parag’s life was all about and a certain impatience that came with it, to get on with the next step of life when a sudden veer thrown up by Fate destroys Parag’s utopia. A rude shock from which he recovers only to find himself in a lockup; handcuffs slapped on his wrists, answering Cops, infrequently getting slapped or rammed in the stomach. All he can remember is his Mother’s worried face and his Girlfriend’s trying to be brave but failing. Everything else was a blur, confused visuals, sounds emotions, events.

Parag Dixit was now in Jail.

A place far removed from reality. A system that functions on its own rules, not so easy to comply. For some it is a life worse than hell. Everything here is taken for granted, including one’s crime, Parag was now surrounded by the dregs of society. He is now a numbed soul… zombied, blank, unmoved… the new entrant to Barrack number 2 and its mini world within… a clear misfit and sitting target for anyone who had anything against clean cut, good looking, upper middle class boys… it’s a nightmare that’s only just begun … compounded by dirty, crowded spaces, inedible food, hostile cellmates, angry Policemen and weird rules of the place….no one believed Parag would survive this, for even a day except for Nawaab, the Resident Supervising Convict (Warder) who believed in two things – one that Parag was innocent and another that his inner integrity would see him through.

From the comfort of his numbness, Parag slowly steps out to actually see and understand the world around him…the world of arrests, court cases, pending cases, years of waiting, broken hearts, shattered souls. Some sad people in search of hope and those who had found their happiness within the four walls too… slowly Parag lets himself feel the helplessness and the anger… rebelling, questioning, hurting himself to gradually learn to accept his Fate and begin to find a steely resolve within.

Why should he accept the helplessness that the system forces upon you when there were those for whom Jail was just an inconvenience, their powers not diminished by a degree and whose hawk eyes were constantly scanning for souls that could be broken in…? Souls like Parag, who were willing to accept any answer that seemed to quieten his questioning mind.

What begins now is a race to the finish between the powerful forces of the place that can offer Parag his freedom and Nawaab’s friendship that can only offer Faith and Hope.

In the end what would you choose…Freedom or Hope?

Exploring life’s tough choices through Parag Dixit’s journey, Jail is a complex fabric of human emotions that is eventually a metaphor for life itself. 

Sounds like Shawshank Redemption ? WTF!! Bhandarkar and Redemption ??!! We would love to commit suicide before it happens.

And in case if you are interested to know more about Neil Nitin Mukesh’s nude scene in the film which is making the headlines, click here and here.